Biblical scholars the world over are searching texts for mention of this, the first sign of the apacolypse: Oprah's Charles Dickens book selections have not sold well. As it states in the book of Golashes: "Oh, there will be a day wince the mighty list from the great provider will be turned asunder, and the Earth shall weep and the people will have the dickens scared from their breast." See! It's all there people! Just cause you snubbed Tale of Two Cities and Great Expectations! Oh, the poop is really gonna hit the fan now! Next month, when O magazine reveals someone other than Oprah on the cover, you will see! The signs are there!
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