Why did the librarian slip and fall on the library floor?
Because she was in the non-friction section.
Clothes on who?
The Library's clothes on Thanksgiving,
but we'll be open again on Friday!
Why did the vampire check out a drawing book?
He wanted to learn how to draw blood.
Librarian: Knock knock.
Student: Who's there?
Student: Winnie who?
Librarian: Winnie you going to bring back
that overdue book, hmm?
Q. Why was the T-Rex afraid to go to the library?
A: Because her books were 60 million years overdue.
Q. Why is that library book you're trying to find always in the last place you look?
A. Because once you find it, you stop looking.
Q. Why does an elephant use his trunk as a bookmark?
A. That way he always nose where he stopped reading.
Q. How can you tell if an elephant checked out a library book before you did?
A. When you open it, peanut shells fall out.
Q. Why does the ghost come back to the library every day for more books?
A. Because she goes through them too quickly.
Q. Why didn't the skeleton come back to the library with an overdue book?
A. He was too gutless.
Q. Why don't elephants ever pay overdue fines?
A. They always bring their books back on time. An elephant never forgets!
Q. What did the detective do when he didn't believe the librarian's story?
A. He booked her!
Q. Do you know how many librarians it takes to screw in a light bulb?
A. No, but I know where you can look it up!
Q. What king of medieval England was famous because he spent so many nights at his Round Table writing books?
A. King Author!
Q. What reference book should you put on your head to keep off the sun and rain, no matter where you go in the world?
A. A hat-las. (If you like, you can call it your "map cap.")
Q. What reference book should you use when you forget your shovel?
A. The dig-tionary.
Librarian: Knock knock.
Kid: Who's there?
Librarian: Winnie Thupp.
Kid: Winnie Thupp who?
Librarian: He's in the juvenile fiction, and so is Piglet!
Q. When a goose goes to the library, what books does she look for?
A. Peoplebumps books!
Q. If you travel to Eastern Europe, why won't you find any books in
Prague's public library?
A. They're all "Czech"ed out!
Part 1: Q. What building has the most stories?
A. The library, of course!
Part 2: Q. If a student goes to a seven-story library
and checks out seven books, how many are left?
A. None. The library had only seven stories!
Q. Where does a librarian sleep?
A. Between the covers.
Q. When a librarian goes fishing, what goes on her hook?
A. A bookworm, of course.
Q. What does a librarian eat dinner from?
A. A bookplate.
Jim said, "My dog tried to eat my library book."
"What did you do?" asked the librarian.
"I took the words right out of his mouth."
Q. What does the skeleton do when she goes to the library?
A. She likes to "bone up" on her favorite subject (and we're not ribbing you, either).
Q. What does the Mummy do when he goes to the library?
A. He gets all wrapped up in a good book.