Well, sorry for the late post, but I just got home from a comedy show and boy is my ass tired! Seriously, it fell asleep. I don’t need a throne, but come on clubs, get a little cushion for a long show. If New Orleans natives
or Cassidy Henehan are ever anywhere in your area, I suggest you get right on that. But that is not why we are here.
Why are we here? Well, well, pushy pants, hold on a bit and we shall tell you. The royal “we.” God knows I am all alone at this. Except for Betty and Dave and the soon to be hired new children’s librarian which I am now very excited about! Let me share a little.
I did not really dream of being a librarian. I know. “Stop right there, sugar shits,” you say, “how could you have not have had this destination in your mind from the beginning? Your mom was a librarian, your grandfather was a librarian, his mother was a librarian, and on and on. It is in your blood.”
Well, see, I rebelled. I liked the punk rock music. I wanted to travel the Earth, writing about all the fascinating things I saw like a moronic, spiky-haired Jack Keroac fueled by desire and passion. It was not to be.
Without going into too many details, I found myself enrolled in the Banned County Polytechnic and Library School on my way to taking over the family public service. I was not impressed by the crop of students around me in the master’s program. Example: in an “advanced” cataloging class one student asked what the difference between LoC cataloging system and the Dewey system was. I know. If for some reason you do not get the joke, find a librarian and get them to explain it to you.
Then I met her. Natalie Ford bounced her way into my life like the spunky teenage sister I already had but with whom I had things in common. If anyone remembers the show Twin Peaks, Natalie bore a striking resemblance in look and dress to Audrey Horne, played by actress Sherilyn Fenn, and to steal a quote from David Lynch, “Natalie was five feet of heaven in a ponytail.”
You owe it to yourself to watch this.
Before you ask, no, there was never a romantic connection. We were just brother and sister from a different mother and father (as far as I know). Music, sense of humor, dislike of mayonnaise, we clicked. She made the schooling and the career path tolerable.
Also, Natalie made me see the need for the profession. The way she talked about helping people made me want to be a better librarian. Unlike me, she had the instant charisma of someone who wanted to help, who was put on this Earth to help. Patient, kind and empathetic, she could talk to a patron for five minutes and know the exact book they needed. A born librarian versus my man-made librarian.
So when she walked into the Banned Library today and announced that she needed a job, I literally tore her resume in half taking it from her hand. Do not worry, she had a spare. Librarians and librari-mans, I think I have finally found my children’s librarian and could poop a brick with excitement. Also, Natalie is the one that got me using the phrase “poop a brick.”
To add pleasure upon happiness, I also got an email from the state saying our computer grant came through! If Dave can hold the old rust boxes together for another month, we should be just fine.
Just a few days ago when Elliot made me that offer, I considered leaving. Now, it seems, things are falling into place.
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