Note: This entry is a continuation from Ref & Circ: Hair Done, Part One.
The library public service desk is divided into two separate but equal departments: the reference department who answer questions and the circulation department that handles materials. These are their stories.
The following is a transcription of a dramatic reenactment of a real circulation transaction. The names have been changed to protect the innocent.
2013 June 1,16:28
Mallory Strudel, library assistant: Hi, can I help you?
Peggy Dumas, patron: Yes, thank you, I talked to you earlier?
MS: Probably, I’ve been here all day. What can I help you with?
PD: I called earlier about a... problem with my hair?
MS: Oh, yes, Mr. Banned left a book here somewhere... said you’d be looking for it...
PD: Is he here?
MS: Here it is... Do you have your library card?
PD: Is Kevin here?
MS: I’m sorry?
PD: Kevin. I talked to him earlier about the book.
MS: Do you mean Evan? Mr. Banned?
PD: No... The man who helped me? He said his name was Kevin.
MS: We do not have anyone working here named Kevin. Would you like to talk to Evan, the reference librarian?
PD: I guess. Can I see the book while I wait?
MS: Sure, I’ll see if I can find him...
[Time Passes. MS calls Evan to the reference desk with the intercom system. MS also checks out several patrons around PD while PD waits.]
MS: Thank you, Miss Everstom. Tell me how that book works out for you.
Evan Banned, reference librarian: Mallory, you called?
EB: Hi, I’m Evan. Can I help?
PD: Hi, you must be Kevin.
EB: Evan. Have we met?
PD: We talked earlier. About my problem... Look.
EB: Um... Wow... You look great without the turban?
PD: It was a towel. And its my hair, silly. The oil came right out!
EB: Oh, yes. I’ve been... we wondered... I’m glad it worked out for you.
PD: It did, it did. And its all thanks to you. I don’t know what I would have done.
EB: It was all the books, really. I’m glad it worked out.
PD: It did. It really did.
EB: Okay... Um, have a great day, then. I need to help... um, order something. Mallory, can you?
MS: Sure. Do you want me to take your towel?
PD: Its a turban.
MS: Okay. Do you have your library card?
PD: What for?
MS: To check out the book.
PD: Oh. No. Is he always like that?
MS: Evan? Um, I guess.
PD: He seemed so nice over the phone.
MS: Yeah, don’t know why he would be weird. Do you want to apply for a library card?
MS: To check out the book...
PD: No, why was he nice over the phone if he was gonna be so rude?
MS: I don’t think he was rude really..
PD: Of course you would say that. You two are probably an item.
MS: With Mr. Banned? No way, he’s like, thirty..
PD: Do you know if he’s dating anyone?
MS: I... It’s really not my business. Do you want to get a library card to check out that book?
MS: Okay, I just need you to fill out this form and I need something with your name and address on it.
PD: Like a driver’s license?
PD: I don’t have a driver’s license.
MS: A piece of mail is fine.
PD: I don’t just carry mail on me.
MS: Anything is fine, really. And we can just give you a temporary account for today. You can check out that one book and just bring something when you bring it back.
PD: What if I don’t bring it back?
PD: What if I lie on the form and keep the book? It looks like a good book.
MS: Then don’t do that?
PD: But what if I do?
MS: Um... Please don’t?
MS: Okay, thank you. Let me just put this info into the system and... I can’t put this.
PD: Why? What’s wrong?
MS: This address is fake.
PD: No, it’s not.
MS: You live at 1060 West Addison Street, Chicago, IL?
MS: No, you don’t. And even if you did, I need a local address.
PD: You didn’t say that.
MS: Ma’am. Do you want to speak to my supervisor?
Natalie Ford, circulation librarian: Hi, I’m the circulation librarian. Can I help you?
PD: You’re not Kevin.
NF: Not last time I checked, no. Mallory said there was a problem getting a library card?
PD: No, I’m leaving. Do you know Kevin?
NF: Not around here. Are you sure I can’t help?
PD: Yes, I’m done with this place.
NF: Okay. Have a good day?
PD: I have a date tonight.
NF: Oh, great! I hope it goes well. I love your hair.
PD: Thanks. You know my secret?
NF: What’s that?
PD: Pour a cup of olive oil in it. Then wash it out.
NF: Ah. That sounds.... excessive.
PD: Can’t argue with results.
NF: I guess not. Good night. And good luck on your date.
PD: Good luck for him, you mean. Rar.
NF: Ha... Okay...