Welcome to the weekly newsletter of the Banned Library! Sure, we’ve been giving updates via the podcast and the mailout of the newsletter has always been popular (available at the circulation desk, must be a library member), but for the first time we thought we would extend it out to you, our internet crowd and see what you thought.
Note: some information will extend from information already given in the podcast and the mailout, but we will try to give some element of backstory to those of you who are new, which will be a lot of you! Sorry if we are bore you old time members catching the newbies up!
So our children’s librarian, Cassidy Bell, has been kidnapped by a terrorist group calling itself “Broken Spine” and is being held hostage in an undisclosed location. Bell was vacationing abroad after the traumatic experience of the library burning down, and it seems stepped out of the frying pan and into the fire. From what we have learned from the internet terrorist database (itdb.biz), the Broken Spine “often kidnap traveling librarians and hold them to learn the secrets of library science. Few librarians are found ‘in tact’ after the secrets have been ‘extracted.’” We will be thinking of you, Cassidy!
Speaking of our children’s librarian, our Summer Reading program is finally over and boy was it a fun time! Almost ten children enjoyed this year’s action packed program filled to the brim with activities and reading fun! A big hand goes out to Rory Childers, the winner of the “most read” contest for getting through half of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets movie. You can collect your prize any time, Rory!
The library would like to remind you that August is National Immunization Awareness Month. Read World War Z to find out more on this topic!
The library lends its full support to director Caleb Montgomery as he continues to lead the Tent City in its fight to occupy Courthouse Square until funding for a new library is promised by the Bannville city council. The population of the Tent City has grown to over three dozen, including a rather involved local economy. Caleb reached out to us this week, saying that all is well, he has been elected king of tent city after unseating all rivals, but the food reserves are getting dangerously low despite regular amounts of meat coming in. We hope this standoff does not last too much longer, not only because the Tent City library collection is growing larger than our own collection, but also so we may have new facilities soon.
The Adult Sunday Brunch Book Club would like to invite anyone who wishes to join to come on down the first Sunday of every month! The book for August is “The Rose That Grew from Concrete” by Tupac Shakur.
Ellen Bell, our new children’s assistant and cousin to our children’s librarian Cassidy Bell, is ramping up her campaign for the Fall Reading Program that starts next week to coincide with school starting! Ellen also cut her hair to look just like Cassidy and is wearing Cassidy’s clothes while staying in Cassidy’s apartment, all so the patrons won’t feel weird someone else is doing Cassidy’s job. Also, Ellen sent out a memo to only call her Cassidy in front of the children during the programs and at all other times. We look forward to what she will do!
IT man Jessie is glad to report that the computer lab is back online after that weird outage last week and that the sheriff and he are hot on the trail as to why all the pets around town are mysteriously disappearing. The sheriff seems to think the newly raised Tent City may have something to do with it, but that seems wrong. Jessie and the sheriff are planning on sneaking in incognito sometime this week. So, thanks for keeping the computers running, Jessie!
We close now with a quote from Grandpa Banned, AKA Old Time Librarian
“I don’t see color. A book’s only important because what’s inside it. Except them Braille ones. And audio, I guess. And I never really got why we had those damn giant map things... Atlases. Unwieldy. Not fit for use.”