Let's not talk about the Frozen short, shall we? Better left unsaid. Years from now, people will tell the story of the short that came before Pixar's latest film with an unbelieving tone. Can you believe someone was stupid enough to pair a twenty minute Josh Gad holiday monstrosity in front of an actual story with weight and meaning, not just as a story but for an underrepresented minority?
Coco is the story of Miguel, a boy whose family won't let him play music, the thing he's born to do. Lucky for him, his story coincides with the Day of the Dead, the one day when the dead and the living intermingle. Miguel and his family learn important lessons about togetherness, history, love, and murder.
Oh, did they not tell you Coco's base story included some murder? Like, hardcore stuff man. In fact, without spoiling too much, you could compare the story to that of another Pixar movie, Up…
Okay, spoilers. Sorry. Whatever, I got to work some shit out. Go see the movie and come back.
So the hero of this story goes to a magical land, finds his hero, realizes his hero is a murderer, and through the help of newly acquired friends defeats the bad guy… Yeah, kinda like Up. I mean, except with less guns and more poison. How did De La Cruz have that poison at the ready to kill Hector, anyway? He was planning on doing that all along, right?
And the dog turning into a helper animal, I've seen that before too, huh? And not just the caterpillar in Bug's Life getting those shitty wings.
Oh, and fuck that grandma for busting the guitar. I know this is a heightened reality and all, but what the hell? That's abusive and wrong. Hit the kid with a shoe or whatever, but don't go John Belushi on his past time just because you have issues. And not even you, your grandma had issues.
And when was this movie set? It seemed like present day, but the kid uses VHS and nobody has a cell phone. I mean, that's cool, it didn't impact the plot, maybe it's the 90s or something or Mexico is a technological wasteland. Just weird.
And what happens to all your stuff when you finally fade away as a dead person? Seems like that guy, the one with the cans and whatever, his crap was up for grabs. If there's a nuclear war, do all the dead people vanish en masse?
And where was Hitler and Charles Manson? The really bad guys people remember? The movie didn't seem to divide things into Heavens and Hells, so there's some pretty bad dudes who are still remembered running around, right? I bet some asshole out there is putting their pictures on shrines, so you know they get to run around. And before you say stuff, Ernesto was a straight up murderer rather people knew it or not, so the afterlife does not have a catch-all judgement system.
That's it. I can't think of anything else.