The Hokey Pokey in Paris
"Just meet us there," the chaperone told me. Those words started one of the more memorable nights of my life.
Read MoreStory of a Ring
He stood with her in a little hallway. They both wore a sheen of sweat and he said something about marrying her.
Read MoreSouthern Language I've Re-adopted
About a year and change I moved from the bayou of Louisiana to the wilds of Provo, Utah. The diversity of the place staggered me
Read MoreFirst Kiss on a Beach
We were crossing into Florida when I realized that this girl might want to kiss me.
Read MorePeer-Reviewed Instructive Librarianship
The time of year has come for school visits to the library. Seniors learning deep research for their final papers. Juniors dipping their toes into the waters of "what is database and peer review?" Sophomores and freshman asking questions such as "where is the bathroom?"
Read MoreGrand Canyon Heartbreak
"You can always let a hole be cause if you try to fill it, you can't ever get it just right," Mrs. Joyce said over me as I tried to pack the dirt back tight.
Read MoreReview: How to Carry Bigfoot Home by Chris Tarry
I will admit, when I saw the cover I was a bit wary thinking this might be a collection of children's stories. Whoa was I wrong.
Read MoreTalking Cars and Boats and Motorcycles in 80s Television
When someone asks me what my favorite television show growing up was, I have to think about that. Hands down, I could say MacGyver because I still think it's better than leftover cornbread with onions. But then I think on all the sitcoms and action shows of the 1980s and have to give it up to a genre: weaponized and sentient vehicles.
Read MoreTo All the Cars I've Loved Before
When performing an expert u-turn on a small suburban street in the middle of the night, watch for curbs. And small animals. But mostly the curbs because the small animals have sense to get out of the way even when finding themselves in the wrong place at the wrong time. You will pop a tire and end up calling someone to bring you a jack at three in the morning.
Read MoreThe Firework King and His Wild Fire
As I write this, a hazy smoke has enveloped the Pacific Northwest and the high desert whatever the hell biosphere I live in at the moment. There may be a picture accompanying this, but if there is not allow me to describe it: Gray haze with shimmering figures in the distance that resemble mountains inhabited by old chain smoking yeti figures who have run out of shit to eat.
Read MoreEighth Grade Kisses and Golf Balls
When I walked into eighth grade, I had my last growth spurt and a new haircut. Six foot three inches with a moppy undercut, I probably looked like a mushroom that grew arms and legs and forgot how to sit down. Inside started a little streak of anger, tempered and fired by friends with the same leanings.
Read MoreHiding in Dark Places
I should have been paying more attention when the boy went into the stacks. I told him not to go, but boys disappear sometimes.
Read MoreA Hot and Private Mess
I tell you all that to tell you this: corporations do not give two craps about local needs
Read MoreHow to Cook Chicken Fried Steak in the Library Breakroom
How many times have you been working the reference desk and thought, man alive I could use a meal? Too many times, am I right? Born and raised in the deep South, my meals tend to lean toward the "chicken fried" variety, so I submit to you my own recipe for cooking up chicken fried steak with mashed potatoes, green beans, biscuits, and gravy in the library break room.
Read MoreYou Won't Believe these Alternatives to Library Fines
How to libraries ever expect to get their books, DVDs, and farm equipment back? The most common way is to institute fines and fees for lost, damaged, or late items. With more and more people being made poor by social and economic divides created by a military and prison industrial complex, fines are not cool. Because of this non-coolness, some libraries have begun to explore alternative methods to monetary library fines.
Read MoreTomorrow will take care of itself
When I was in kindergarten, some kid named Derrick said he did not want to be my friend. That hurt. Kick me in the stomach, cannot breathe crying hurt. Rejection is the monster that we all run from and from time to time will knock you down and tear out your heart.
Read MoreLibrary Mascots Through History
As you all know, Wichita Falls library has been desperately seeking a name for its racoon mascots. These mascots have a long and treasured history with the library system, much like the fabled lions that grace the New York Public Library. I promise you, by the end of this blog entry you will know the name or names of these branded creations.
Read MoreHow Game of Thrones Should End
One of you sent me a story that's been floating around about a Maryland prison banning the Game of Thrones books because they have maps in them. This prompted a discussion in the library.
How would you end Game of Thrones if you could not find out the ending due to some arbitrary bureaucratic nonsense?
Read MoreDriving While Poisoned
Having food poisoning and driving a car might seem like a bad combination, and I am here to tell you they are. If you can avoid getting food poisoning, I suggest you do. If you do get food poisoning, stay out of your car for all of our sakes.
Read MorePoison Books in Denmark and Libratarians
Over at the University of Southern Denmark in the country of Denmark, they found book that could kill people. Not some incendiary texts like Mein Kampf full of crazy stupid ideas of harm, but actual books with poison on them.
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