Luke in the Library

Every library where I have worked has Luke Skywalker as a patron. Luke was set up in my first week at each institution. He's checked out display materials, put book club books on hold, and reserved spaces all over the library. Luke is my silent library partner.

     To put your mind at ease, Luke Skywalker does not exist. That's not the full truth. He lives in the hearts and minds of children the world over. And apparently in Canton, MI and Portland, TN. Those are not my Luke's and you should leave them alone.

     Plus my Luke's address is 1130 Galaxy Far Away St. Not many of those in the United States.

     So you ask, library dude, why make up a person for the library? Is this unethical, immoral, or stupid?

     First of all, fuck you.

     Second, let's leave all those goody-goody notions at the library double doors. This is not some crazy way to damn the man, either. Simply put, Luke makes my life easier.

     Not just mine. Most of the people I have trained have used him and made their own. Luke is the reference department slut, passed around to whoever needs a quick helping hand, a kind word, and a good time but not a long time. He's also the reference department bouncer. Anything put on hold or reserved for Luke is noticeable by other staff as reference.

     Now I'm hearing you ask, library dude, why not just call it The Reference Department or some official title?

     Who let the buzzkill question haver in this blog?

     Hey nerd, Luke Skywalker can go where staff cannot. He's a patron account. His holds do not go to the bottom of the pile. He can keep a room longer because when Admin sees a patron using the room they don't immediately try to cancel the booking for their own means. Luke is a person to Administration with thoughts and feelings and the ability to complain.

     (Administration often forgets or simply cannot hear staff complaints. We think it is genetic born from incestual nepotism.)

     Luke also has the benefit of looking cool on lists. Nobody cares when they see "Department, Reference." But everybody wants to know Mr. Skywalker's bullshit. When staff see his holds arrive, those items came to my team. Sometimes with lightsaber sounds (or Transformer sounds if it's Brenda cause she can't remember sounds so good).

     Do you have a Luke? Or a Seymour Butts or I.P. Freely? Let me know.